Week 7 | Tuesday
Tuesday – Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Anger
Written by Sam Vavzincak (Pickerington Campus)
Ephesians 4:25-29
Key Verses:
“Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body. In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.” (25-27)
Think back to a time when someone you know said or did something to make you angry. If you’re anything like me, you probably don’t have to rack your brain for too long before a situation comes to mind. People are imperfect, so even if you surround yourself with people you love, people you respect, and people who love Jesus, they will eventually upset you. When that happens, everyone has a natural tendency of how they like to respond. Some people shut down and do their best to avoid any confrontation. Some immediately voice their thoughts and feelings, but in a way that adds fuel to the fire and makes reconciliation even more unlikely. Some will talk to anyone and everyone about how they feel, except, of course, to the person that actually upset them in the first place.
What you do when your neighbor upsets you has the ability to shape or shake your relationship with them. It is crucial that we are extra attentive to the words we say, who we say them to, and how we say them. Paul’s charge to the Ephesians in this passage makes three things clear:
- Our response should be truthful (v. 25). We have a responsibility to tell our neighbor the truth, even if it’s uncomfortable. When our anger stems from the words or actions of someone we know, especially a fellow believer, it is our responsibility to be honest with that person about how we feel.
- Our response should be prompt (v. 26-27). Letting anger fester is dangerous. When we wait to address a situation, we are giving the enemy a chance to make the situation much worse than it needs to be. The longer we dwell on things, the more likely we are to villainize the person on the other side, assume bad intentions, and permanently damage the relationship.
- Our response should be helpful (v. 29). Maybe you are great at speaking your mind and doing it quickly, but it always seems to make the relationship with your neighbor worse. Remind yourself of the goal of the conversation. You are trying to build one another up and reconcile the situation. If your primary goal is to win an argument, you may do that, but ultimately, that’s not going to be helpful.
Reflection Questions:
- What is your natural response when someone upsets you? Does it reflect the Biblical response that Paul encourages in Ephesians?
- Is there a current situation in your life where you are letting your anger fester?
- Who is someone in your life who navigates conflict really well? What can you learn from the way that person approaches these difficult situations?
- Of the three responses, which do you struggle with the most? Why do you think that is?
Prayer Prompt:
“God, you are slow to anger and rich in mercy. Help me to extend to others the same mercy and grace that you extend to me. Let your Spirit fill me in times when I need courage and guide me when I need the right words to say.”